Butter Advice Needed

Okay Y'all, I need some help. Butter making baffles me! Sometimes it whips up in no time flat, and sometimes it takes HOURS! Literally! I've heard that you need it chilled as much as possible, and I've heard the it needs to be room temperature. I've heard that it needs to be aged, I've heard that it needs to be fresh. Argh! What's the trick?! My blender is on it's last leg, and I'd really like to make it in the food processor. PLEASE help me! What are your tricks and tips for making butter. (don't assume I already know ANYTHING!)

What's grosser than gross?

*Warning, this post contains a disturbing image.*

Several years ago I found this delightful appliance at my local Goodwill store. I could not believe my good fortune at finding such a handy gadget for such a wonderful price. I don't remember what I paid, but I bet it wasn't over $5. I used it a lot in those first few months, but soon tired of cleaning the lovely blade component, which is more akin to a screen than a blade, and so it ended up in the back of my appliance cabinet.

Fast forward about five years.

About a month ago I was craving oranges. I bought a bag of those little flat naval oranges thinking it was a bargain. I ate a couple and the rest languished on the table. They were beginning to dry out. Rather than allow them to go to waste, on Monday night I decided to juice them! When I was almost finished I reached into the exhaust (where the pulp comes out) of my juicer to grab a piece that had not processed to put it back through. Let's just say it didn't take me long to inspect the inside if that thing! I used to think people who did this sort of thing were morons who deserved what they got. Now I'm one of 'em! It's been two days, and it still hasn't scabbed over. I almost went in for stitches, but decided they didn't have anything to work with.

(2-22-10): It's healing amazingly fast. Don't get me wrong, I still have to be exceedingly careful, and if I bump it it starts bleeding and I want to cry... but still, it's getting there. I think all those little swirls of skin are going to graft and help it heal much more quickly.
(3-1-10): I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. ~Psalm 139:14 This passage doesn't just apply to the formation of infants, but the weaving together of every aspect of us, throughout our lives. The speed with which my finger has healed is amazing to me! I am so thankful for our all-knowing Creator.
(3-8-10)Still healing beautifully. Next week is spring break, and so I won't be able to post a new pic on Monday. I might post one on Friday if I remember.

(3-26-10) Almost completely well. :-)

Deliciousness!!!

Chicken Broccoli Lo Mein

This is one of my favorite meals. I just learned to make it last September. It's from the Fix It and Enjoy It Cookbook.

Put a pot of water to boil for the noodles.

Cube one pound of chicken into about 1" pieces. Fry them in oil. I used olive oil with a drizzle of sesame oil for flavor.

While the chicken is frying, combine 1/4 c. peanut butter, 1/4 c. soy sauce, 1 1/2 Tbsp. brown sugar, 1 Tbsp. lemon juice, 1/3 c. hot water, and 2 cloves of garlic, minced in a glass jar with a good lid. Put the lid on and shake until contents are thoroughly mixed.

Once the chicken has cooked for about 5 minutes, add one medium bunch of broccoli, cut into bite sized pieces.

Put the noodles into the boiling water. I used rice noodles, which I adore. They cook almost instantly. If you leave them in too long, they will turn into a glob. It's taken me several tries to learn how to cook them, and they are still not perfect, but much better. My technique is to salt and oil the water, stir them frequently while they are cooking, and drain them by ladling them up and letting it drip off the noodles, then piling them on a plate.

Strawberry Jam

My momma always made the best strawberry jam. It was one of her specialties. I haven't had REAL strawberry jam in over eleven years; since I left home. Now I have a real house with a real kitchen, and I'm gonna have me some jam!

I started my quest for jam by going to my former local U-pick farm. They wanted $3.60 a pound, and you pick them yourself! I nearly fainted!!! They are $1.50 a quart in the grocery store right now, and there's about a pound and a half in a quart! I refused to pay that much. If necessary, I'd wait until my own plants are big enough to produce. Last Tuesday I asked around my new town for contact info on a U-pick farm for strawberries. The next day, one of the ladies I visited with gave me a call. She knew of an Amish family who might have some. She gave me their telephone number (Amish...telephone...?) and I called. The Amish wife and mother had a traditional Amish sounding name. It was so neat. She spoke with a very thick Dutch accent. They do more of a truck-patch style farm, and don't normally allow others to come and pick. They do the work themselves. However, the berries were so sparse, it wasn't worth her time to pick them anymore for the season. I asked if she would consider allowing me to come and pick myself. I didn't mind if it was harder picking. She told me there were so few that she didn't know if I would be able to find enough to make the 12 quarts I wanted. I told her I was okay with that. I'd take what I could get. She agreed that I could come as long as I understood I may not be able to find as many as I wanted. We arranged for me to arrive at their farm at 8:30 Thursday morning. I arrived ten minutes late, because even with directions, it was hard to find. It's one of those places where you can't get there from here. She was so gracious and not at all put out with my tardiness. She had five children, and I surmise one on the way, even though she looked to be around 18 herself. (I know she wasn't, but she looked SO young!) They were all so sweet and friendly. From what I've read about the Amish I expected the children to be somewhat fearful of outsiders, and the adults to be standoffish. That wasn't the case at all. She and I talked a mile a minute the whole time I was there. She had gone out the night before and picked 12 quarts of berries for me, because she was worried I wouldn't be able to find enough, and she only charged me $2.70 a quart for them, "Because they're so scrawny." I was thrilled! I plan to return in the fall for sweet potatoes, and feel I might have made a friend.

It was so interesting to get to see a real Amish home and see how they REALLY live. They didn't have any electric outlets or light switches. They had gas lamps every where, but they had a refrigerator. I expected everything to be plain, no frills or anything to lend prettiness. She had curtains at the windows, not just blinds, and she also had flowers on her canisters and tea kettle. There was a picture on the wall, too. I can't say enough about what a positive experience it was.

I canned 12 pints of freezer jam, seven pints of canned jam that can just sit on a shelf, and then froze a gallon freezer bag FULL of berries to be used later.